So Contagious

So Contagious by Acceptance

February 14, 2009 I've made this last. And Ps. I love him.

April 2005 He was playing his bass to the world, I was hiding behind my violin. I don't know what it was. I think I like him. May 2005 I've never been a fan girl before. But screaming his name with my friends, while he's on stage in the spotlight, I can't help it. Smiling is too easy. This is silly. Stop liking him. He'll never be yours. September 2005 Him and his friends are back again to visit. I wonder if this will be regular? But I won't start liking him again, promise. March 2006 He came to help me take pictures of the soccer game for the newspaper. Why would he do that? I don't need help taking pictures. Why would he just suddenly jump out of his chair to come help me? Weird. But he's actually nice to talk to. Was he always like that? December 2006 I went to the school concert. When he saw me, he poked me in greeting. Is that even normal?

August 2007 Me and my friend just dropped by his house to drop off an invitation. He looked surprised when he saw me, he probably forgot I existed. But he remembered my name, anyways. I didn't know she and him were friends before, but that's cool right? Maybe we'll be friends now, haha. November 2007 I've been depressed lately. I ran into him in the hallway and we talked for a little bit; he gave me some advice and I felt better. But the way he looked at me made my stomach flip-flop, and I suddenly remembered why I liked him a couple years ago. I wonder why he took time out of his day to talk to me? January 1, 2008 Heart broken again. Practically third time this year; its a record. He's disappointed in me, he told me he thought the last one would have lasted longer than the others. But he's right, I should try harder, in relationships anyways. But he also feels bad for me I think, he's talking to me a lot now. He seems different now, though. Older. Sad, in a way.

Jan 15, 2008 We talk a lot. I should do my homework, but I'm talking to him instead. I've never felt understood before. But I never had anything worth understanding. I had a dream last night; of spotlights and rock music, and screaming. Memories make me feel dizzy, and warm. Jan 29, 2008 Everything was finished for me, before. But now I have him to live for, my best friend. Just about. Sometimes, I wish he were more. But I told everyone I wasn't going to start liking him again. But what if I'm lying to them? What if I am lying to myself? February 6, 2008 I'm done lying, I'll admit it; I like him. I can say it, only because he's already told me this first. Ironic isn't it? Three years ago, I don't think he was even aware of me. February 14, 2008 Valentines day. The most beautiful present I've ever received... and suddenly, the best boyfriend I could ever have. My New Year's Resolution: To make this last.This time, I'll make love work, I'll make it right.